Honestly...most of the time I'm hurting and sometimes hating those around me. I'm sick of being what I am. I think people look at me and see this stupid little girl that they can say anything they want too. I'm either some something "cute" that people think its ok to touch or something to make a joke out of. I don't mean to sound like I've been abused...but some times I'm looked at like I'm some kind of entertainment for some bastards. I look younger than I am and I'm kind of short. I think I'm something for some freaks to perv on and talk down to. I've wanted to kill myself for so long...I probably sound so insane writing this. But maybe there's something seriously wrong with me... or I'm writing in the wrong forum. And I have been drinking right now.I'm just hurt and whenever I've been to a doctor they've been less than helpful.