I'm a 30 year old who has battled with various anxiety disorders and depression since my early teens. It started off with OCD for which I had CBT, it helped for a while but then things just got worse. Now I suffer with panic attacks along with some social problems. I have always been shy but my problems now are more than that, I will quite happily go to work and do everything I need to, but as soon as some one suggests a night out I freeze. just the thought of going out makes me panic. at first it was just I had to have someone with me who I really trusted like good friends, but now i will only go out if I have to and prefer to have my parents with me. It is so silly I'm an adult who can't socialise with people without my parents. I started a new job 6months ago and I'm sure my collegues think I am boring because they go out regularly together and always invite me but I can't. what if I panic or get left alone? there are all these what ifs and they are slowly ruining my life. I am a person who needs other people to survive but I am losing friends one by one because i am no fun. I am so lonely I have thought about self harm and suicide. when I'm not at work i feel like a prisoner shut in my house.
sorry about that but I have never really had anywhere I can just let my true feelings out before