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  1. #11
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Liverpool
    Posts
    4
    Hi Billie, yes, suffering similar to you, what started it.

  2. #12
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Chicago, IL
    Posts
    1
    Hi all,

    I saw this and jumped because I have similar problems; I have severe social anxiety and I can't go to school because of it. I have tried so many times to go to school but no matter what I do, I always end up back at square one, which for me is home schooling. I enjoy home schooling greatly, but even though I enjoy it, I wish I could go to school and meet new people and just be normal. Just a little more info about me though...

    I'm in my first year of high school and my fears are of what could happen, not neccesarily what will happen, are what worry me the most.
    To add to things, my negative self-image and low self-esteem have made me do some things that I'd love to blame on anything else but myself. That thing, you ask? I cut myself. It's my deepet, darkest (not so) secret. Everyone knows about it, but I wish no one did. I know that when people ask they are only curious, being so because they know nothing about it or because they just want to help. But when people ask me about it, in a way that they mean to mock me or make fun of me, it's the worst feeling in the world. It's like the feeling that I did something horribly wrong; that I've done something I can't take back or say sorry for. The cause of my anxiety in the first place is the fear of these things happening. The feelings I have when they actually happen are not nearly as bad as the feelings I have leading up to the situations. So basically, that is the source of my problems: the fear of the unknown and the fear of uncomfortable situations. So, that all being said... does anyone have any words of advice as to how to get through it? Maybe something that works for you or someone you know? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

  3. #13
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    819
    hipsterflipster,

    I'm off to bed, but I wanted to give you this: Safe hugs! (((((hipsterflipster)))). I understand the severe social anxiety.. I'm still struggling with mine, but it takes daily effort and it gets slowly better and better. I hope to talk more later!

    Colourgirl

  4. #14
    I'm studying conversation books. There are a few easy reading books with basic ideas to follow. The last one I read is How To Start A Conversation and Make Friends by Don Gabor. I've also worked a couple of years in a large company and finally quit because I was lonely. It's hard to work, work, work and feel lonely day after day after day. The reason I was able to stay there as long as I did is because I did have one friend for awhile until she quit. I also work a social anxiety workbook where I can write about my personal experiences and practice reframing them in a positive light. But I've had a lot of failure with work. I find I do better in a small company. I'm also trying to get a job working with dogs and the disabled. I get a lot of emotional fulfillment interacting with dogs. And I feel so protective of the disabled that I feel satisfied when I can help them.

  5. #15
    Hi Billie, I just found this web-site today and thought it might be good to find people with social anxiety that I can chat with. I've had this all my life. I have been in therapy for 17 years on and off. I'm 47 years old. I have a job and have had it for almost 3 years. This is the longest I ever held a job. I am in fear of losing it, I have recently walked out a couple of times due to my anxiety and panic disorder. I'ts hard and would be really nice to chat with someone who understands. universalape

  6. #16
    I have a college degree in Psychology (go figure ). I do currently work-cleaning medical offices (not quite what I would like to do w/my bachelor's degree). BUT, it is an option if you don't want to be around a lot of people. I work cleaning a dental office-I go in after they are closed for the day-and I'm the only person in the entire building. I am 28 and have had jobs off and on, but this one is by far the easiest for me, just because I don't have to interact w/other people. It of course doesn't really help my social anxiety-but working w/a bunch of people never helped either. Right now I don't make much money ($8/hour) but am thinking of going out on my own instead of working for another company-my mother-in-law was directly hired by a medical office to clean (after hours also) and she makes over $20 an hour.

  7. #17
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Malaysia
    Posts
    13
    hi,i had agoraphobia and socialize problem has become part of it.i once go to college i can get along with it for several month,after that i quit because of my socialize problem and im afraid of being humiliated..when i walk in crowded places,i lost my mind,i cant think clearly what should i do,i just walk along the way..
    im already 20 and im a men but i had gilr name,that makes my social life worst..
    i just thinking if i can have a work from home,in front of computer it would be nice because i can have my own money,and make friends in this virtual world.
    in fact,the one who pays my internet bills is my mother..
    i think we should find someone with same problems,maybe get work in same place so that we can support each other.
    Last edited by Lonelyvictim; 09-11-2011 at 10:32 PM.

  8. #18
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    9
    I have horrible social phobia and I cannot stand the thought of being "trapped" with strangers in a strange place for eighthours a day. I feel like I don'treally have a personality so to speak. I have nothing to talk about except what I watch on t.v. When I try to talk to people I get nervous, sweat, stutter, jumble my words and often regret the conversation, however brief it was. I always feel like people think that I am ugly, or stupid, or boring. That or they secretly hate me and are just acting nice to my face. Because of my social phobia I have become agoraphobic. And I rarely leave my home.

  9. #19
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    1

    I feel exactly the same :(

    Hi,

    Ive just read your post, and this is the very first time Ive looked on a site like this due to how desperate ive become . I feel exactly the same!
    I go to work (because i have to) and I feel like i have ne personality, and im percieved as boring or even ignorant as i dont or cant hold a conversation. I judge myself every second of everyday and therefore feel like everyone is judging me. I cant escape my thoughts. I have absolutely no friends, im single and have been for years and feel like thats my life. theres no help. I often think about ways of killing myself as i cant cope with the life i lead and cant see a way out.
    ive looked online for medication but what does seem to work for others isnt available in the uk and docs wont subscribe it due to the side effects.
    I never new how common this thing was until a couple of days ago, since looking online at sites like this, so my one comfort is that im not actually alone.
    I know how you feel...every single day is like a mountain to climb in regards to a normal working day...i dread every day
    Im sorry if what im saying is making you feel even more helpless, i just want you to know your not the only one and it would be great to chat to someone who feels the same.
    Take care xx

  10. #20
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    1
    Hey just joined this group. Meeting my new partners mates yesterday reminded me how lonely it can get

 

 

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