Originally Posted by paulj
found this site more by chance than anything else i guess i should start at the begining (with a bang) just before christmas i (we) lost our son (month old) to a "cot death" my partner almost saved him but the damage was too much for him to come back he fought for 4 days before we had to accept that there was no hope of a recovery and i had to tell the dr to switch off his machine he was our first
at first i was coping ok going thro the grief process dealing with it all throwing myself into things decorating etc and running a half marathon for charity after i completed the run (raised £3k on behalf of the scottish cot death trust) i started having panic attacks (non diagnosed) id feel like i was stopping brething just as i was falling asleep heart would race and i was sure i would not waken in the morning during the day id convince myself i had cancer every kind id work my way thro my body after 3 or 4 months not sleeping (3 hours a night) i went to see the dr i explained my siuation everything that had happened he said i was depressed but he did not want to prescribe me anything (didnt want to be put on anything anyway!) he told me to take nytol for 2 weeks and come back and see him he also told me that life is hard and just to deal with it (i had asked for counselling still waiting!) he also told me that i was getting on and should try for family as soon as we could as we were geting on and to reduce th risk of further complications sooner was better
i didnt go back prob should have and now the attacks are back not sleeping scared im going to die thinking i have cancer all the depressing thoughts*
sorry its a bit long winded but wanted to start with a bang
oh and hi everybody* :lol:
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