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anh2100
10-05-2007, 05:19 PM
Hi everyone.I found this site today and wanted to introduce my self.My name is Robyn I am a 26 year old mother of 2 girls.I want ed to share my story with you and hopefully find some help in all this turmoil I am going through.

About 4 1/2 years ago I was on my way to meet with my mother when I had a panic attack out of the blue.Instead of continuing on I turned around and went home.Well that was the start of the whole issue with being agoraphobic.The next day I didn't want to leave my house in fear.So I stayed in and the days went by,then turned in to weeks until finally my now husband helped me get up the courage to go see a doctor.The doctor only confirmed what I had already knew which is that I had a panic disorder.Well the doctor put me on meds and I went on about my way.I waited it out a month before I figured out that the meds were not helping.So,I tapered off of the paxil and the doctor put me on Lexapro.Medication after medication I still had no luck.I was to the point where I didn't want to be on any medications b/c they weren't helping and i figured what was the point.The only meds that help me have any type of enjoyment in my life was xanax and ativan,which I read up on and refused to become addicted to them.


So I stayed med free for almost 2 years in which I was doing o.k.I was able to go places and do some things.I even was able to get married last year.Well about early July I had a relapse while driving(keep in mind I was only able to drive or go anywhere as long as I had someone who could take over driving if I felt I couldn't)and things started to go back downhill since then.I have only been able to go to my mother's house which is 5 mins away.I want to go to the doctors but I can not seem to bring myself to go.I don't have any meds(i.e.xanax or ativan)to take so I can at least get to a doctor.I have read up a lot on Agoraphobia and while I know a doctor hasn't diagnosed me with it I am 100% sure that I am.So here i am today on this message board just looking for....something.

If you have made it thus far without falling asleep thank you for reading.

God bless,
Robyn

jade
10-06-2007, 06:57 AM
welcome to the forum, I'm pretty new here and everyone has been so lovely here :) You sound EXACTLY like me, one night I had a panic attack, thought I was dying and it traumatised me so much so the panic attacks came every day and night. I couldn't eat, sleep or do anything. Why it had just come upon me I don't knoe- I'd always been so bubbly and "the life and soul of the party" I was 19 at the time (now 23) and after a stay in hospital they put me on prozac which helped. . . but then, 8 months later I was pregnant so came off my meds and thought I was strong enough. for 2 months I was fine but then one night I had a huge and unexpected one, the whole time worrying what it was doing to my unborn baby :( Because I was pregnant the only meds the doc would give me was valium to take at the start of a panic, and not to be taken regularly. Whilst out in a town 8 miles away from here I started getting tummy pains so I went to the local hospital to check the baby was ok. I started getting really anxious and panicky so took three 5mg valiums. I was in such a state that even thah didn't calm me down so I continued with my panic attack and puked up everywhere :mellow: From then on I decided that only my home village was safe. I saw a homeopath and had 5 months of acupuncture but that didn't help either. After my daughter was born, I went for my 6 week check and told doc how down and anxious I was and begged for prozac but she wouldn't give it to me as I was breastfeeding. I left the surgery in tears, that doc was a nasty cow. I breastfed for almost a year but by then I was having panics left, right and centre and even 40mg of temazepam didn't stop them. so I stopped breastfeeding and went back on prozac and, boy, did I feel better now that I no longer panicked at home :) They really lifted me up but my fear was really bad and I was still unable to leave my home town so the doc put me on clomipramine. It did wonders and helped me sleep. Only bad thing was that it put over astone on me and increased my appetite and I have a really sweet tooth anyway :( So, me being vain, switched to escitalopram thinking that cos it's an ssri it would help me lose weight but what a pile of poop it did. So, 2 wks ago I weaned myself off it and went a bit loopy and had a dreaded panic attack that went on for hours, as mine always do :( Here I am today, still very much agoraphobic but went back on clomipramine yesterday. I'm really hoping it will help me again like it did last time because another panic attack will send me crazy and I know I'll try and commit suicide. I feeel a bit woozy today as aswell as an anti-dep it's a sedative too. It just means I'm going to get fat again. Oh no but what can I do??? I'd rather be a bit podgy than thin and a nervous wreck, sob sob. Hope you make some lovely friends here xx

dino
10-06-2007, 09:47 AM
Dear Robyn
First off a huge welcome to the forum ,i'm no doctor but your symptoms sound to me of classic agoraphobia, i myself suffer from agoraphobia,anxiety and panic so i can relate exactly to all that you are going through :(
By coming here you will get loads of support and i hope to met you in the chatroom one night ,just remember robyn we are all here for you ,your not alone :)
love Dino
xxxxxx

http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p251/dino_042/i18707521_5832_2.gif

Anna
10-06-2007, 02:56 PM
Hiya anh2100
http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l302/Anna1968/i16822997_25430_21.gif I'm sure you will find alot of people here that really understand where your coming from I myself suffer with agoraphobia anxiety and panic I know that its so hard cope with some days, you will love it here the live chat is so welcoming too lots of lovely people
love
Anna
xxxx

DP
10-09-2007, 08:22 AM
hi and welcome robyn,
sounds pretty much like agoraphobia to me. you need to ask the doc for some help and the sooner you ask the better you will feel. If you cant get to the doctors then maybe your husband can go on your behalf.