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08-08-2007, 03:47 PM
My husband Paul has become my only link to the outside world. He brings me water when I'm thirsty, sits with me for hours rubbing my hair during a flashback, he has had to become mother and father to our children, he has had to learn to be my primary care taker and believe me that is no fun job. Without him I would perhaps be in a group home somewhere. I depend and rely on him for every little thing. The most miniscul thing that you do not think twice about I am to weak to get on my own. I think of this all the time and wonder how many of the signifacate other suffer in silence, probably the most horrifying side of this illness. To have to sit back watching the one you love suffer and there isn't a damn thing they can do about it. It must be horrible for him. I will tell you this, I wonder all the time if the roles were reversed what I would do. I want to believe that I would stay and take care of him. I want to believe that I would step up like he has and take care of my other half with the patience and Love that he has shown me. I honestly don't think I could do it. I wonder and ponder all the time would I be as couragous as him. I know I could never be. He never and I mean never complains. This may be a bit to much information by my marine loves sex I mean its on him mind every min of every day for some reason he never grew out of it. He never cheats ever I know this for a fact. And I can't after all that has happened give him what he needs. He must feel so lonely. I don't know why he dosn't just pack his bags and leave. He deserves much better then me. But he won't. He hasn't and he tells me all the time he dosn't even want to. He says He is happy just being there for me. Its enough. Only time will tell what will happen to us but I belive we are as madly in love as the day we were married. I am so lucky to have. I just wanted to post this if someone elts has a similar family member who needlessly and tirlessly takes care of there mental ill loved one.

Emma

dino
08-09-2007, 08:14 AM
Emma the guilt i have putting my darling husband through hell day in day out cos of my mental health problems breaks my heart into a thousand bits as i can see by your post it does you also
If the shoe was on the other foot woulsd i do the same for him definately i believe you marry for better for worse in sickness and in health was what our vows said and this december we will of been married for 27 years ffs how hes no an alkie putting up with me is a miracle in itself lol
Not only has james got to care for me he cares 24/7 for our severrley handicapped son ,and for my elderly mother how to fuk the poor mans not had a nervous breakdoon is a miracle ,i know from before all this shit happenned to me watching our son undergo 26 operations nearlly losing him so many times i know from experiance trauma such as that can break a marriage in bits im so glad i can say it brought us closer together and we are as in love now as we always have been its not easy the guilt no holidays no picnics no shopping everyday things others take for granted but a impossible task to a person with severe agoraphobia
oh yea i got to add this cos im a person who says it as it is sex sex wht to fuk is sex but i tell him he had a hand use it :lol: :lol: ,theres ather ways to show love and im a born again virgin pmsl :lol:
ok i will shut my gob now before james goes and gets the bar o soap to wash ny filthy mouth out lol ,in my opinion if any husband leaves due to you bring ill there not worth pissing on :angry:
love Dino
xxxxxxx
ps:james i love ye with all my heart thanks for always being there for me http://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u90/Glowin_Glow/318.gifok ok i know its foreign but i loved the pic think its says i love you lol :D http://i171.photobucket.com/albums/u303/jltdmt/ShowLetter1.gif