dino
02-25-2006, 07:57 AM
HOPE THIS WILL GIVE EVERYONE A LAUGH ,PS IT ALL FACTUAL LABELS
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of crisps: You could be a winner! No purchase nesessary.Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dove soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.(But it's *just* a suggestion!)
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on box bottom): Do not turnupside down. (Too late! You lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.(Are you sure??? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.(But wouldn't that save more time?) (And whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery.(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness.(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children.(Or pets! What's for dinner?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.(Hmm, now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts.(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet,eat nuts. (have lobotomy)
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
LOTS LOVE DIANE (dino)XXX HAHA
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of crisps: You could be a winner! No purchase nesessary.Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dove soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.(But it's *just* a suggestion!)
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on box bottom): Do not turnupside down. (Too late! You lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.(Are you sure??? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.(But wouldn't that save more time?) (And whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery.(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness.(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children.(Or pets! What's for dinner?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.(Hmm, now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts.(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet,eat nuts. (have lobotomy)
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
LOTS LOVE DIANE (dino)XXX HAHA